A  TIME OF TRANSITION

   The fall is an auspicious time; it is a time of transition. The days of sunshine are coming to a close in this area and it is now becoming more the time of clouds.
   The connection of man and woman to the sun is a very special relationship. It is the action of the sun that brings warmth to the environment, nourishes the plants to grow the food and assists the body and mind to feel healthy. However, when the clouds cover the sun it does not mean that the sun is not there. But if you were to view the sun from a mountain top or from an airplane you would see that it is just as bright as ever. However below the clouds, in our daily lives, we are not so aware of the sun's existence. We do not see the sunrise rise or the sun set, it simply gets lighter in the morning and dark at night. 
   With out direct exposure and connection to the sun we get a little sad. We might feel a bit depressed at not experiencing the warmth of the rays of the sun. So even though we stay indoors in warm and light places, still the absence of sun is a depressing factor. It is noticed that in darker northern countries the rate of alcoholism and suicide is a bit higher. It is an aspect of this sadness, this depression caused by the feeling of disconnection from the light. 
   So in our area we have a great contrast. The winter season is long and dark, and the days of summer are characterized by long days of sun and brightness. We become known as a very outdoor people during this time. It is the haunting beauty and call of this area. 
   When we experience the brilliance and warmth of the sun we become very attached to it. And when it goes away we feel bereft and long for even glimpses. 
   The spiritual path is very much like this. We long for the spiritual sun, the sense of warmth, the glow of love and the comfort of living in light. It is an experience of living in a gentle bliss pervaded and nourished by direct experience of the beneficent sun. But there are winters in the spiritual life also. What occurs during these winters?
    Spiritual winter is a time to go inside rather than find the sun from without. It is a time to accept the existence of clouds and to clear them. The experience of bliss is an experience of unrelenting uninterrupted sunshine, but we must clear the dark places first we must clear our own personal clouds. In winter does the sun cease to exist for us? No, but we do not directly perceive the existence of the sun and so we lose connection with its brightness. Internally in our efforts to reach the sun we feel surrounded by clouds, just as our efforts at meditation are frustrated. Although intellectually we know the sun is there, some despair arises in our minds concerning our ability to reach the sun. Is it possible to do this, or do we slowly fall back into despair and frustration? It is at this moment that the heart of the spiritual struggle is revealed.  Can a spiritual aspirant hang on to their path in the apparent absence of the sun? It is a test of faith and belief. "If the sun is there, I will enjoy it. If it is not, what is the use? I will find my enjoyments elsewhere even if they be transitory and elusive." 
   Consuming those things which bring transitory feelings of pleasure is one way that many substitute a material world activity for the spiritual quest. Consumption of material goods, vacation "escapes" and short exciting relationships and romances are common, but end up inherently unsatisfying, for the thirst is never fulfilled. 
   Our dilemma is whether to choose to pursue transitory pleasures or the difficult path to deeper fulfillment, this is always in the forefront of our existence.  One is a habit that must be fed; the other a difficult path to climb up a mountain to an unseen destination of pinnacled development. Which do we choose?
    So this is the struggle we face each day but in the change of seasons we see it in a larger sense. Fall is a time we prepare to go off on a spiritual quest, a challenge, a journey. We turn and face our own inner challenges, the clouds that prevent us from seeing and realizing the ever present inner sun. Will you join on this journey or let another winter go by without taking up the challenge? The choice of course, is up to you.   

Marc Nevas August 27, 2002